Monday, 12 March 2018

The Crusading Knights

The Crusading Knights

The Complete And Utter History Of Dr Who (Part Fifteen)

TARDIST landed in unobstrusive mode and neither wheezed nor groaned though it did make a slight electronical noise, as can sometimes happen. Doc. Who and his numerous helpers found themselves in an olden forest, wherein King Richard had taken some men and a bird for his amusements.

They had done a landing in 'The Crusading Years' (as the story are generally called) and Ewen were Sirred and had some ants up his arm at one point, but this is not necessary to be Sirred these days, thankfully.

Barbaba were taken prisoner by a man called Al Kalaylee who said she would be pleased to be deaf, but I think he were exaggerating as the incidented music were quite good, really.

Vichy were disguised as a boy much to everyone's confusement and Dr Whom stole some cloths from a market stall which were a bad example to childerens watching at home, but crime figures for cloth-stealing did not appear to increase that week.

This story is unique in the Second seasoning in that half of it survive, but the other half do not. Thus no-one now knows how the story ends, but the next story starts with Dr Whos asking for some water, so researchers generally agree that the cliffhanger at the end were that Dr Wh. were thirsty in a suitably dramatic way.

The King in this story were the First incarnation of King Richard, whose physical appearance done a change when he were in France. When he were King, Richard said he would sell London but thankfully he could not find the receipt, so the transaction did not go through, which were a relief to most peoples.

Many have called this story as being like Shakespeare, who done much on the subject of Kings and it were issued as a book like happened to Shakespeare things, so there is some truth in this. The book had some drawings in it as a bonus, which is more than you often get with Shakespeares so in some ways it were even better.

'The Crusading Times' were briefly considered for a spin-off series in which market stallman Ben D Here had adventures selling cloths to peoples and his catchphrase would be "It will ride up with wear, most noble lord!" but thankfully everyone came to their senses the next morning and it did not happen.

And so ended Doctro Who's adventures with 'The Crusading Men'...

Next Episode:

"I know."

(By Andrew Trowbridge)

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