Today marks the 4th anniversary of my Dad's death and I still miss him so much.
He died unexpectedly in hospital and I was unable to be with him, but I am forever comforted to know that he was surrounded by both my brother and sister and their families.
To remember him on this date and other significant ones I always make a donation to charity in his memory. I started off donating to charities relating to the illnesses he suffered during the last years of his life and death, but try to donate to a different charity each tine.
So today have I made a donation to a local animal charity. Although he would have been loathe to admit it, he was a big softie when it came to animals and we had many dogs and cats over the years.
When we were coming up to the first Christmas after he died, we decided very late on to put a tree and decorations up. And Andrew and I purchased a small pink tree from our local Tesco and set about decorating as best as we could. Including our 11th Doctor and TARDIS ornaments which take pride of place each year.
Anyone that ever met my Dad would say that in his younger years he loved to turn our huge living/dining room in a Christmas Grotto, covering every inch of the celling with those foil decorations and years before that paper chains and balloons. My friend Jane always asked if the Christmas Grotto was up, but as it took several hours to do as he got older the decorations became simpler and consisted of just a few decorations, lights and the odd nativity scene.
My Dad would always fool around when I had a school friend around, making one friend choke once as he chased his peas around his plate, much to my embarassment. I wouldn't mind that now.
One of my favourite photos of my Dad is of him in my nan's backgarden and he is typically messing around. He would always send both his grandchildren and great grandchildren home very overexcited as he had worked them into a frenzy.
Something he was doing right up to just before he died.
I miss the fact that when I phoned him which I did everyday, he'd spend the first couple of minutes moaning about what had or hadn't happend that day.
But he'll always live there in the back of my mind, ready to be called upon for a fond memory.
I just wish I could give him one more hug.
(Written by Lisa Parker)
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