Sunday 8 April 2018

"The biggest bonanza of sportin' skill I've ever clapped eyes on!"




"The biggest bonanza of sportin' skill I've ever clapped eyes on!"

Warren came round yesterday and we spent the evening watching 'Paddington 2' and all getting a little teary-eyed over how lovely it is, but before that we actually did some work on 'Round The Archives'.

Yes, we've finally recorded our article on 'Dad's Army : Museum Piece', which means that most of the material for Episode 21 is in the can (or laptop). I've got to start on the edit to see how it all hangs together, of course, but that's par for the course.



Shy Yeti Paul has also been in contact with an idea for a piece that we said an immediate "Yes!" to, so hopefully we can welcome him back on either Episode 22 or 23.

But we wanted to do a couple of short reaction videos as well, so we took the wrapping off Volume One of 'The Indoor League' which had arrived on Friday. Keen viewers of our stuff might have noted that Volume Two turned up on Thursday, but that's what you get for ordering from different sources...


As we said a few blog posts ago, 'TV Times' once provided a guide to the various sorts of dartboard that were out there and 'The Indoor League' uses the Yorkshire variant, which looks normal enough until you notice that there are no trebles. So you cannot score 180 no matter how good you are!



Fred Trueman (with support from his pipe and pint of bitter) provides some memorably idiosyncratic commentary "There's one feller who's shown up from Scunthorpe in a ten-gallon Stetson 'at and 'e's floating coins around in the best game of Shove Ha'penny I've ever 'appened across!"



First prize for each game is a hundred quid, which was not to be sniffed at in 1973.

Producer is Sid Waddell (later best known for his Darts commentary which approached surreal poetry at times) and Executive Producer is John Fairley who apart from being the co-author of 'The Monocled Mutineer' is also credited on 'Arthur C Clarke's Mysterious World' which demonstrates the range of stuff Yorkshire TV were prepared to make...



There's quotes galore even in the first episode, with inventive lines about the competitors including one who  "having failed his degree, is now working for a Turf Accountant in Leeds" though no explanation is given for the claim about another chap that "his skittle play has deterioriated slightly in the last minute or so...". Possibly too much ale? Though he does rack up at least one Flopper, which is apparently a good thing.



The Bar Billiards ("snooker with bunkers!") is interesting as it is not limited to blokes, with John Smith pitted against Vera Poberezhec, landlady of the Bowling Green Hotel, Bradford. The mushroom style targets have since acquired a new layer of meaning for those of us who lived through the 1980s...



Commander Ed Straker from Gerry Anderson's 'UFO' seems to have turned up for the darts match. though the commentary describes him as "The man that looks like the Viking War God!" which is perhaps overdoing it a bit...



Table football ("so quick - faster than ice hockey!") has its own special rules, of course. For example "the plastic men must not be spun all the way round, it must be more a flick of the wrist" and by gum, these students have somehow developed a very powerful wrist action!



I'm not a fan of sport on television by any means, but there's something homely about 'The Indoor League' which actually appeals to me. You get the feeling that most of the people involved are just turning up,  having a go and seeing what happens.

The description on the back of the DVD describes the series as "an antidote to the multi-million pound media sensation that modern day sports have become" and, of course, whenever I see table football, it always reminds me of Eric and Ernie...



Oh, and a special mention must go to the End Of Part One and Part Two slides which all go a bit Art Deco for some reason.



The chap with the moustache and top hat could almost be a distant relative of The Amazing Mister Bellamy, famous for his Liquorice Novelties in the early days of 'Doctor Who Weekly'...



Thinking about it, Mister Bellamy might even have borrowed his pipe from Fred Trueman. But where has he secreted his amazing Pint Of Liquorice Bitter, we ask ourselves? Hmm, maybe we had better not pursue that line of thinking...



(By Andrew Trowbridge)

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