Dr Who In An Exiting Adventure With The Smuggling Sailors

Dr Who In An Exiting Adventure With The Smuggling Sailors

The Complete And Utter History Of Dr WHO? (Part Twenty-Nine)

BENNY and POLTY's adventures in the parts of the Cornish men.

In 'The Smuggling Fellows' POLTY were mostly mistaken for a boy to demonstrate that in the olden days, rough seafaring men were not aware of Gender Issues, but more concerned with getting their hands on each other's baubles and the like.

DRWHOHO met a man in church who said a saucy limerick to him about a pirate's special friends that would allow him access to their secret treasure. What is amusing is that the man said it wrong in Episode One, which is why it took another three weeks to finish the story, when it were only planned as a two-parter originally, but what can you do?

There were much filming in Cornish places, though not a mention of cream teas or scones, which was perhaps an oversight and maybe were a sign that nobody working on the show had ever been West of Woking.

Although this story do not survive, there is the usual Curious telesnapes which give you some ideas and also some footage of the Behind The Scenes filming which show that the man playing Cheerybub the Pirate did all of his lines from behind a bush that he brung with him. Apparently, he regarded this as a Lucky Bush and it can be seen in most things he appears in but actors have all sorts of superstitions like that, I am told!

There were also a nautical man who went by the name of Captain Pyke. In his early pirate days, he would wave his arms around wildly when giving explanations and once he got his hand caught in some unruly rigging and it come to harm and had to be replaced. In the same way that Captain Hook had a hook, Captain Pyke had a special tool all his own and this idea of a man having metal parts would return in the very next story.

The name 'Captain Pyke' were also the inspiration for several characters in 'Dad's Armies' including Captain Square, obviously, and Talfryn Thomas who was tickled when he heard this, apparently.
There were a big fight at the end, but not enough stuntmen to do it as planned, so all the stunt artisans would keep swapping wigs and trousers and could often be seen wrestling enthuiastically with themselves behind gravestones, if you got close to the screen.

One good thing about having the film of the filming of the Behind The Scenes filming is that it shows the rarely-seen Whomocart which were a form of transport that William Hartley-Hare had had specially designed for him by a tipsy bloke he once met running a market stall in Blandford.

It were a rather low-slung affair that could zip under low barriers where a normal car would not be able to pass and were ideal for DRHO to get into special places he might otherwise be denied access.
Although it left the series when Mr Hartley-Hare did, he still used it to open fetes and garden parties when he could not be bothered to turn up himself.

Then DRWHOS found the treasure, but handed it over to the authorities for tax reasons and it got all cold in the TARDIST, possibly because they had left the sunroof up...

Next Episode:

"What do you mean?"

(By Andrew Trowbridge)

Nothing At The End Of The Lane

Nothing At The End Of The Lane

We may be cursed with a silly sense of humour at 'Round The Archives', but we like to think we take the whole area of research pretty seriously. A lifetime lurking on the edges of 'Doctor Who' fandom teaches you that so much of what was once accepted as The True Facts actually turns out to be mangled accounts of Stuff That People Have Remembered Slightly Wrong.

But there are publications that consistently manage to achieve the Gold Standard of research, and this always involves going back to the original paperwork and documentation. A fine example of how to do it right is 'Nothing At The End Of The Lane' and today's video is devoted to the wonder that is Issue Two, from June 2005.

Edited by Richard Bignell and Robert Franks, it's an absolutely fascinating read. This one is a Archive Special and with pages from people such as Andrew Pixley detailing the wiping of the 405- and 625-line videotapes of the 1960s, you know you're in for a real treat.

As an aside, that picture of some members of what would become The Restoration Team circa 1993 should have been made available as a pull-out pin-up!

One of my favourite pieces is the section about John Cura, who preserved so much missing television in the form of his telesnaps. We have a collection of BBC memos about his activities (including an amusing reference to "negligee scenes") and we get to see a few 'Softly Softly' pictures (one set with William Hartnell and the other with Nick Courtney), plus a 'Z Cars' one with Roger Delgado.

There's stuff about 8mm film taken during the shooting of various stories and a complete listing of all that remains from Seasons Four, Five and Six. With 13 years having passed since this (then definitive) list was published, it's amazing how much more material has since come to light, which gives us some hope for the future...

For more information, take a look at the 'Nothing At The End Of The Lane' website which can be found here...

(By Andrew Trowbridge).

The Generation Gap

The Generation Gap

It's only when you start going through it that you come to recognise the huge amount of material that Sid James did for film and television comedy. The 'Carry On' films and 'Hancock's Half Hour' are the stuff I'm most familiar with, of course, but in recent years we've added things like 'George And The Dragon' and 'Bless This House' to our collection.

But, with so much to get through, we've rarely found the time to mention his name on 'Round The Archives', so when Paul suggested that he'd like to do an article on 'Bless This House', we were very happy to take up his offer.

Running from 1971 to 1976 (the year of Sid's death) the show also gave rise to a film which, as 70s sitcom adaptions go, is pretty good as well.

'The Generation Gap' (written by Vince Powell and Harry Driver) is our introduction to the Abbott family, who apparently gain the second 't' in their name somewhere between the opening and closing credits!

Sid is concerned about their children, Mike and Sally, but for somewhat inconsistent reasons, as his wife Jean drily comments.

Mike is firstly criticised for spending an hour the the bath - which by my standards is simply a quick dip. More of more concern to Sid is that Mike never goes to the pub, doesn't like football and has never had a punch-up. And now that he's 18, surely he should have brought a bird home, by now?

Sid wants to have a chat with Mike and brightens considerably when he hears that his son is intending to go out with a 'Jean' (as Sid hears it) Fletcher. They met whilst throwing stones at the American Embassy, like you do.

Conversely, Sid is worried about Sally wearing a padded bra to attract boys. Sally makes a point or two by shoving some tomato ketchep squeezers up her top, in a scene that clearly has Diana Coupland struggling not to laugh and involves a brillliant reaction from Sid.

Sid's anxiety escalates when a packet of pills belonging to Sally are discovered in the kitchen and 'Jean' turns out to be Gene, a male ballet dancer. Sid's corn flakes go everywhere with the shock.

There's some business where Angela (known as 'Hot Pants') from Sid's office is invited over to make Mike see that there are other life choices he could make, though this doesn't quite pan out the way Sid is hoping for, after Jean has had a word.

In the end, Sally's pills turn out to be simple aspirin for her headache and Mike & Gene plan to take two nurses out. As Paul says in the article, given the time this was written, Sid might be concerned for his kids, but his attitude is by no means awful by modern standards.

It's easy to watch a definitely raises a smile or two. We've only seen the first couple of seasons, but you get a lot for your money with the DVD set (which even include the film!) and the characters and actors are people you enjoy spending time with.

And coming up, you learn that Anthony Jackson from 'Rentaghost' lives next door with Patsy Rowlands from 'Kinvig'. So for listeners of  'Round The Archives' it's a fictional universe with all sorts of possibilities if you use your imagination...

(By Andrew Trowbridge)

Mrs Muddle's Puppet Show

Mrs Muddle's Puppet Show

'Pipkins' was always a series that tried to make something out of nothing, but Episode 291 ('Mrs Muddle's Puppet Show' TX: 22nd September 1981) takes this philosophy to new and rather magical heights of improvisation.

Peter is repairing what appears to be an elaborate doll's house, with some less-than-helpful running commentary from Topov and Hartley, the latter of whom is worried that Peter might be going at it rather hard and doesn't know his own strength. This seems to be the voice of experience here, but we are not privy as to what previous events have led to this opinion.

Neighbour Mrs Muddle (as played by none other than Sue 'Rentaghost'  Nicholls) enters, bearing Tortoise's newspaper, and wastes no time in scrounging a cup of tea. Advised that it might be cold, she says that she doesn't mind as long as it's wet. Personally, I like it as hot as possible, but that's my problem, not hers.

Topov claims to be starving and wants to know what Mrs Muddle bought when she went shopping, although Hartley regards this question as being nosy.

Upon hearing that Mrs Muddle has purchased a decent spread of items, Peter invites their visitor to stay and have tea with them. Clearly, the staff at Pipkins have learnt never to pass up an opportunity.
Topov asks for a cup of tea, but expects more than one lump of sugar, causing Hartley to mutter the phrase "Sweet Tooth!" in a judgemental sort of way.

Mrs Muddle takes the lid of the box of sugar lumps and operates it as a makeshift ventriloquist's puppet, which astonishes Hartley at this apparent display of magic. In fact, Hartley even refers to her as Wonder Woman, in a line that has stood the test of time better than they might have expected in 1981.

A puppet show is planned using the food and at this point a load of lines travel down the screen, betraying that this is an off-air copy recorded on Betamax.

Topov and Peter are dispatched to build a stage and Hartley is to assist in making the edible puppets. The loaf of bread is adorned with two round buns and one long bun, attached via the miracle of cocktail sticks, so that it resembles a rather squared-off elephant.

Hartley's gaze is transfixed by a healthy-looking cucumber, which is cast in the role of a crocodile, once a mouth and some eyes have been gouged out.

As Russell T Davies has pointed out, a cucumber is usually followed by a banana, but it takes the wise old mind of Tortoise to suggest putting some sticky tape on the fruit so that it could pass for a tiger, although the end result does look more like one of those yellow-and-black caterpillars you get in the garden.

Mrs Muddle proclaims that Tortoise is a genius and he admits that this is something he has just learned to live with...

In the yard, the stage backdrop is nearing completion, once an orange has been placed in the sky to represent the sun.

Hartley seems to be acting as Script Editor and once the final line has been agreed upon, it's TIME for the play to start.

There's a bit of bickering behind the curtain which falls down and we are treated to some animal noises to set the scene, although these do get a little out of hand. It's never adequately explained why there appears to be an unseen cow in the jungle...

A hot cross bun wobbles into view, bemoaning that it is lost as well as being hot and cross. The elephant is not in the mood to help cross people, plus he is too big and heavy to show the bun the way out of the jungle. A likely story!

The tiger is angry and fierce, so is of little help and frankly, there's no much more joy to be had from the crocodile who is feeling sad and tearful.

The bun comes across a Green Jelly Lake and looks at his reflection. This shot is achieved by the simple method of putting a stand-in bun into some jelly . Though the two buns don't look that similar, if we're being brutally honest.

The bun reflects on his lot for a while and becomes happy instead of hot and cross. I'm not sure I entirely follow his thought processes, but let's not quibble here.

Now that he's cheered up a bit, the animals are much more disposed to show the bun the way out of the jungle.

There's a song and just as I was getting into it, the show's over. Which means it's TIME for the end credits to flare badly as we say goodbye to 'Pipkins' for another week.

(By Andrew Trowbridge)

Mad Things To Make From Vision On

Mad Things To Make From Vision On

In 1976, mad genius inventor Wilf Lunn (at the time best known for his work on 'Vision On') released a book that, for a mere £1.95, detailed how to make all manner of useful items, including a starting handle for your goldfish bowl or a worm cosy.

When I was at Cranborne Middle School, in the late 1970s / early 1980s, this was one of those books you were very lucky to get hold of, as it always seemed to be on loan from the library to some aspiring inventor or other.

Looking through our copy in 2018, I wonder how many of these would-be Wilfs met with an unhappy fate, though. For a book that is presumably aimed at a younger audience, it does call for some worryingly advanced construction methods for some of the items.

The picture that claims to be 'Wilf At Home' begs the question as to whether this really is his home at all. If it is, he's doing all right for himself. The panelling and window in the photo seem to be significantly wider than our entire living room. I'm wondering now if it's actually some stately home or other that might have played host to some long-forgotten 'Vision On' film sequence? Sadly, there's so little of the series officially available, that there's no easy way to check up on this.

There's some simple paper-folding (hats, five-pointed stars and talking fish, for example) that I could probably have a stab at, but not being very good with my hands, most of the book is definitely outside my comfort zone.

Alarm bells start to ring when we reach the Quasimodo Coat Hanger with the ominous instruction : Heat Till Red Hot With A Blow Torch. Hang on a minute there, Mr Lunn. This could end badly, I fear...

Wilf was always known for making Things That Blow Up, but thankfully there's nothing more ambitious in that department than an Exploding Bird Scarer that uses toy percussion caps, though I would guess that even these were more common in the 70s than they might be now.

If you want to bend some glass, Wilf directs you to a your nearest Fish-Tail Bunsen Burner. Now I've worked in chemistry labs for many years and even I don't have one of these at home! Perhaps I'm not as Mad a Scientist as I would like to pretend...

But I cannot fault the imagination that is on show here.

There were, of course, Things To Make in 'Blue Peter' annuals and the like, but they never thought to encourage you to make a Hovering Fat Cat Exerciser or a Model Mollusc For Mummy.

And, of course, we all know that every bored budgie would welcome a Dancing Dick in its life...

(By Andrew Trowbridge)